re: SHIFTING SANDS

Have you ever stood at the edge of the ocean, feet firmly on the sand until the next wave rushes over your feet and suddenly you're sunk down or off balance? Sometimes it takes more than one wave but ultimately the footing beneath you has changed. Sometimes you also get a big splash, whether you were expecting it or not!

This week I got a text from a friend of twenty years saying they'd love to catch up and wanted to update me on some health news. Pit in my stomach, I could guess what that might mean and I'm sorry to say I was right. 

I'm sure you know exactly what I was feeling because those calls are never easy, whether we're sharing our own tough circumstances or learning of someone else's. We hold hope with each other and don't give up, but it's hard all around either way. 

So I've been thinking about life and my life and how it feels when you're caught off guard and on the receiving end of any situation you don't want. I know in my 46 years there have been plenty! Can you relate?

Here are some thoughts about the shifting sands of life, including strategies for holding on and making it through when that's the place you find yourself in.

FACTS ABOUT SAND:

• Sand is the result of transformation. It's created by the weathering and erosion of rocks, minerals, and shells through the power of wind, water, and changing temperature. This is a physical example that the hardest things can be transformed into something soft over time.

• Sand is always moving. Sand dunes can travel up to 100 feet per year, shaped by the year. (what?!) This is a reminder that life is always in motion, even when we feel stuck.

• Walking on sand requires more effort than walking on solid ground. Just like navigating uncertainty feels harder—but it also strengthens us with every step, building resilience as we go. And in the hardest moments, resilience isn't just nice to have- it's the lifeline we need!

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REFLECTION QUESTION:

• In our hardest moments it doesn't feel like it, but looking back on your life can you see how extreme pressure and challenges have created clarity, strength, or even beauty in your life? Did you weather the storm and survive, or even eventually thrive?

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TAKE ACTION FRAMEWORK: Find Stability with the Shifting Sands

1. Plant Your Flag. Define what matters most in this moment; through this season.

•  When everything feels like it's moving, or the ground beneath you has been washed away, you need an anchor to hold fast to through the uncertainty. That anchor is your values, your vision, and your purpose.

• ACTION: Write down what matters most right now and why. Your values. Your goals. This is your guidepost for action. 

  
  

2. Anchor in the Present Moment

• When the ground feels like it's crumbling, we might need to stop and breathe. (Literally and often.) Breathwork can be a powerful tool to calm your nervous system and bring you back to the present.

• ACTION: Try a simple 4-4-4-4 "box breathing" exercise. (inhale for 4, hold for 4, exhale for 4, hold for 4, and repeat.). It's a small but grounding step you can use any time at all.

3. Reclaim Control Where You Can.

• One of the worst parts of big events is feeling powerless in the uncertainty, but there's always something you can control and it's crucial to remember this. It might be your mindset, your daily habits (honestly, these little things make a big difference in carrying us through the uncertainty), or when you choose to sleep. The hardest moments often require us to strip our life down to focus on the essentials.

• ACTION: Write down three things you CAN control right now - no matter how small - and commit to them, for you. 

  
  

4. Find Meaning in the Chaos

• This is the hardest part and might not come until later, but it is also the most transformative. When it's the right time ask yourself, "What is this teaching me? How can I grow through this?"  This does NOT make the pain disappear and we are NOT trying to look on the bright side of things, but when we choose meaning and purpose our pain can transform.

• ACTION: Journal on this question: If this experience actually was shaping me into a stronger, wiser version of myself, what might that look like? What is this chapter of my story bringing into my life and teaching me?

  
  

5. Lean on Your Tribe

• Sometimes we can get through hard things alone, but you deserve to be helped and held when life gets heavy. If you're a person who often gives but struggles to receive support, I really encourage you to let others help carry the load when life feels heavy. (and, no, it doesn't need to be the end of the world for you to accept this.)

• ACTION: The next time someone asks if they can help, find a way to say yes. If no one is asking, reach out to one person today and share how you're feeling and what you might need. Remember: vulnerability is a strength and if you don't allow others to help you, you're denying them the opportunity to serve.

  
  

6. Visualize the Other Side

• We use visualization to encourage us towards our dreams and goals and the importance of this strategy is ten fold in our darkest moments.  Hold onto the vision of what you want and who you want to be on the other side of this. Literally, close your eyes and picture it.

• ACTION: Imagine yourself a year from now, stronger, wiser, and thriving. What does that version of you want you to know today? What are they telling you?

  
  

Friends, whatever season you're in, I see you and I'm here for you. I mean this sincerely:

We're in this together,

Your Coach Candace

P.S. You deserve support and direction, even when- and maybe especially if- life feels like shifting sands. If you're struggling to adapt to big changes... If you're feeling stuck in patterns that no longer serve you... If you're ready to build a stronger foundation for your future... Coaching might be the next step to anchor your foundations.

I offer consults, 1:1 highly transformative packages, and weekly group coaching. My DM's and inbox are always open to hear what you're going through.  I'd love to send you a link to our group coaching calls so you can hop on to check it out for yourself. Just let me know if you'd like to and I'll send it right over.