re: STANDARDS

STANDARDS. I used to think that standards were the ceiling- what we're aiming for. I now realize they are actually the floor- what we allow for ourselves.

Related ideas often get confused as standards, but it's important to know the difference.

Values are core principles. Your why.

Intentions are how you want to show up.

Expectations are how you want other people to show up.

Boundaries are what you choose to do when expectations aren't met.

Goals are the targets you set as a future result.

Standards are the bare minimum of your behavior. They are the lowest level of what you allow yourself to do.

(let me say that again.)

Standards are the lowest level of what you allow yourself to do. They are the rules you set to maintain self-respect, define your identity, and guide your actions. 

This is something I had to realize for myself. If I think I have high standards but then look around and see an overgrown yard, piles of laundry, and people in my life that treat me poorly- I actually wouldn't have high standards. At least not in those areas. 

What I would have is higher expectations, unmet intentions, poor boundaries, and I'm probably not living up to my values. 

Now let's remember: Standards are personal and we're not here to judge.  I'm already defending that person in my head:  they probably need help; work hard at their jobs; have health concerns; are doing the best they can…. and that could be true! That's why we're not judging ourselves, and hopefully not judging anyone else!

However, it still benefits us to evaluate our own current standards so that we can see clearly for ourselves- however uncomfortable it might be in some areas - if our patterns of behavior are living up to our intentions; are helping us meet our goals; are aligned with our values.

REFLECTION QUESTIONS:

1. How am I showing up for myself in these areas? (remember: this is not about other people)

   1. Health & Well Being

   2. Relationships & Communication

   3. Career & Productivity

   4. Financial Responsibility

   5. Personal Growth & Mindset

   6. Home & Environment

   7. Daily Habits & Presentation

2. Which areas do I choose to have higher standards?

3. Which areas am I okay with having lower standards in right now?(lower doesn't mean bad or unworthy. this is not a moral judgement.)

4. Which of my current standards do I choose to change?

ACTION STRATEGY:

1. Download this checklist of ideas to help you name your current standards and set some new ones 

We're in this together,

Your Coach Candace